Perseverance

If I had to pick one word to describe the journey I have been on over the last several years it would definitely be perseverance.  This perseverance is not just speaking to my weight loss journey, it applies to every area of my life (and anyone's really).  We as humans so many times want to jump onto easy street and get from point A to point B with little to no resistance.  However, that is often not the way it goes.  Sometimes God has a different idea of how we should get from point A to B, and more often than not, that can include hitting a few other points first.  Now does he do that to just watch us squirm and hear us whine?  I don't think so.  Not by a long shot.
There are so many times throughout the Bible that we are called "Children of God".  I like to take that in a very literal sense.   I truly believe that God is our Father, and as such he only wants what is the very best for us.  He doesn't allow us to enter into a situation without already knowing the outcome of that situation.  Just as an earthly parent will bend over backwards and stand before a bullet for their child if they need to, I believe God will (and has, think Jesus on the cross) do anything possible to only allow only the best for his children.  Now, does that mean that we are never going to have issues or problems in our lives?  Absolutely not!  In my opinion there are two kinds of trials that we might find ourselves in: trials that we bring upon ourselves through going against God's best will for us (comes from our sins or by simply ignoring the promptings of the Holy Spirit), and trials that we have absolutely no control over.  I believe that regardless of which kind of trial we may find ourselves in, God has a way out of it.  Here is the catch:  although there are times where God will miraculously get us out of our problems, more often than not he is going to help us through our problems.
When I graduated college in 2006 with a degree in Agricultural Business, I landed an awesome job where I would be doing the exact thing that I wanted to do which was  to buy grain from farmers (I know I am a hick what can I say).  I loved my job.  I got to work with farmers directly and I got to dabble in the commodities markets, It was a blast.  Of course, it had its challenges and I definitely did my fair share of griping anytime we had a policy change (we humans hate change don't we), but as a whole I really enjoyed that job.  However, after having worked for a little over 3 years, I got word that the facility I worked at was being shut down.  I was absolutely devastated.  I either had to move to keep my job, or I was going to be laid off.  My husband and I talked and prayed about it and really didn't feel any peace about moving so decided that I would just search for a new job.  Talk about a period of questioning God!  I went about 2 1/2 months (very long months) before I landed another job.  Definitely a period of perseverance as I finally resorted to simply cold calling every single business that I thought I might potentially want to work at.  I got a job as a office manager trainee at a local feedyard and once again I was pretty excited at my new position.  However, within about a month's time I realized that being stuck in an office doing the same thing day in and day out was not really something I enjoyed.  Talk about discouraging.  I even kept quiet about my feelings toward my new job for a little while, I didn't even tell my husband, I thought maybe I just needed to give it time.  Of course, my attitude toward this new job didn't get better.  I felt like I had totally missed the mark.  I must not have been listening close enough to what God wanted for me, at least what I thought.  I had been doing a lot of thinking during this time and finally talked about it with my husband (which I probably should have done a little sooner).  I started to feel like maybe I was suppose to be a teacher (drastic career change, I know).  After another month or so of hating my job I decided to start working toward my teaching certificate.  I was so determined to get out of the job that I hated that I finished my online courses in about 5 months time and, thanks to a husband who was already a teacher, I landed an interview for the position I have still today, an 8th grade math teacher.  As you can probably figure out, I got that job.  I gave my 2 weeks notice and started substitute teaching for the last 1 1/2 months of school, then taught summer school before starting as a full time teacher the following fall.
Why do I tell you all that?  Well, now that I am able to look back on that extremely financially tight, emotionally draining, frustrating, tiring year, I know that it was a huge blessing.  God was guiding every single step of that journey.  Even the job that I hated was at least a way of paying the bills until my real job opened up.  That was one of those "out of my control" trial periods.  I persevered through that time because of a couple of things; 1) I never lost my faith, I may have gotten frustrated or discouraged but I always came back to my faith and the knowledge that God is my Father and wants only the best for me, 2) I took steps of faith to change my situation (i.e. finding a new job and taking the teacher certification classes), and 3) I had a husband who let me cry on his shoulders from time to time.
Now, when it comes to my weight loss journey (you knew I would get their eventually), I look at that situation more as a trial that I have brought on myself.  There is no denying my love for chocolate, what can I say!  However, even though I have a great deal of the responsibility in my situation, God still wants only the best for me (remember the Heavenly Father deal).  He wants to see me get through this and learn from it.  I can honestly say that going though this journey has been a blessing, although I can still pray for that miraculous size zero, right?  I feel like I am learning and growing every single day because in times of weakness or when I just want to give up, rather than turning to the coke or candy bar, I am starting to learn how to turn to God with my troubles.  I think that as a parent, that is what he desires.  Just like when our own earthly children are going through something, as much as we may just want to fix the problem for them, we know that sometimes it is best for our child to learn for themselves, with us standing on the sidelines guiding and encouraging them.